So it’s been a minute since I’ve blogged about anything Steelers-related here (or anything else for that matter for quite a while). My apologies for all 12 of you readers out there. Your boy got a little burned out over the last year. #BlogLife ain’t no joke.

But I got some good news for you. I’m back! And you can thank Jalen Ramsey for turning that shit around. Topsy turvying that motherfucker, if you will.

You see, I was having myself a nice little Wednesday yesterday morning. I made it to the bus stop on time (which only happens like twice a week), arrived at the office, popped my already prepared breakfast into the microwave (I obviously hit all my macros since you know I do CrossFit), then hopped on the twitter machine to check the news for about a half hour while not doing any real work whatsoever.

So there I am, scarfing down my scrambled eggs with spinach (with a side of black beans, of course) and bam! I see this shit:

Jalen Ramsey going full scorched earth on basically every quarterback in the NFL (you can read the full GQ article here). And if I’m being totally honest, most of it was spot on. For instance, he mentions that Joe Flacco sucks and that Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers are both good. These are, in fact, correct assessments.

But here’s where he lost me. First, he referred to Kirk Cousins as “good” and as a “hell of a quarterback.” My dude, Kirk Cousins is about as mediocre as your middle-aged parents’ sex life. Sure, they probably still fuck time to time, but there’s nothing pretty about it. Same goes for Kirk Cousins.

Second (and most importantly), Ramsey had the audacity to call Big Ben “decent at best” and that he’s only good because of AB. Are you fucking kidding me?!

My dude, the Super Bowl rings came before AB.

Look, something this stupid shouldn’t have gotten me this triggered to the point where I felt the need to come back from my hibernation and write a blog to prove a point that Jalen Ramsey doesn’t know what the fuck he’s talking about, but guess what? It worked. I’m triggered, and I’m writing a blog.

Here are more reasons why Jalen Ramsey’s a moron:

Sure, it’s easy to call out a 35-year old future hall-of-famer in the twilight of his career as “decent” whenever he had probably the worst game of his professional career against Ramsey’s Jaguars last October (33/55 with 312 yards, 0 TDs, and 5 INTs). But does this dumb idiot not remember the second matchup in the playoffs last season?

Yeah, yeah, the Jags still kicked the shit out of the Steelers again at Heinz. But do you remember Ben’s stats?

37/58, 469 yards, 5 TDs, 1 INT, and a passer rating of 110.5.

Prett-ay, prett-ay good.

And here’s the funny thing. Jags fans (who didn’t really exist until last winter) are already chiming in and agreeing with Ramsey’s assessment that Ben is nothing more than a gun slinger. How about you bird brains take a minute and look at these passes from the game.

Call all three of them great catches all you want (they were). But each of these passes were thrown perfectly where only Ben’s receivers could catch ’em.

And here’s a fun fact for you. Jags’ cornerback A.J. Bouye didn’t give up a single touchdown to a receiver in all of 2017 leading up to this playoff game. In this one, he gave up two. Sure, both were against Antonio Brown, but here’s another interesting tidbit about the connection between AB and Ben Roethlisberger.

With Ben Roethlisberger over the last three seasons (or their last 41 games together), Antonio Brown has averaged 105 receiving yards, 7.8 receptions, and nearly a touchdown per game (.73 TD/game or 31 total).

Without Ben Roethlisberger over the last three seasons (Ben has missed a total of five games due to injury in that span), Antonio Brown has averaged 68.2 receiving yards, 4.8 receptions, and has scored 0 (ZERO!) touchdowns.

So you tell me. Were Landry Jones and Mike Vick just that shitty when Ben went down, or is Ben’s “decent at best” gunslinging ability all Antonio Brown requires to turn himself into quite possibly the best receiver in all of football?

Or maybe. Just maybe. Jalen Ramsey’s full of shit. Because, perhaps, it could very well be that both Ben and AB are good at what they do.