So if you’ve been reading any of my blogs or tweets over the past few days (fyi – you should be doing both if you aren’t already doing so), you’d know that I’ve been complaining about being sick af lately. Bad timing, right? We had the Pens clinching the Stanley Cup on Sunday, which inevitably means tons of blogging to be done by yours truly. Well, I have to confess my blog game’s been pretty shitty over the past few days. And for good reason. I have a goddamn sinus infection, and it’s being a real motherfucker.

Here’s the quick little back story on how this all started before I fast forward to last night’s little episode: So Saturday afternoon I’m getting after it a little bit. One of the guy’s in my bowling league (yes, I’m in a bowling league) was getting married. It was a little white trashy wedding close to home. Actually, it was more like a picnic, to be honest. Anyways, everything started off smooth. My friends and I were throwing back Miller Lite’s, and I was dominating everyone on the beer pong table (my partner and I went 8-1 over the course of the day, by the way). Then, the sun went down. And that’s also when the chills came. It was 75 degrees, and I was sitting on a bench like a goddamn eskimo without a coat shivering away. On top of that, I had like 25,000 mosquitoes biting the shit out of me. I went from having a good time boozing at a “wedding” to being the most miserable man on the planet in a course of a few hours. I got home that night, stuffed some ibuprofen down my pie hole, and hopped into bed. I woke up the next morning in a pool of my own disgusting sweat (I sweat a lot, by the way), yet I still felt like a bag of dicks.

Fast forward to last night. With my throat still feeling like absolute hell after two straight days, I cracked down and finally called my uncle (who also happens to be my PCP). I gave him my symptoms and he prescribed me antibiotics. I’m a not a huge fan of taking medicine of any kind, but my throat was getting to the point where I was having trouble eating food so I hopped into my car and raced to the pharmacy like I was fucking Helio Castroneves. I needed something immediately. I got home, washed down an antibiotic, and laid down to try and get some rest. 20 minutes later, I wake up in excruciating pain. My right ear was literally throbbing, and it sounded like I was under water. I tried my very best to keep thinking about guys like Nick Bonino skating around on a broken shin to remind myself that I was just being a pussy. That worked for about 35 seconds before I inevitably started texting my mom (MY FUCKING MOM. I’m 27 years old.) that my ear hurt really bad, and I didn’t know what to do about it. She told me it was probably just the fluid from my sinuses making it’s way to my ear, and that I should just take some ibuprofen. I sat there and probably contemplated whether or not I should stoop down and take ibuprofen or go to the emergency room (seriously) for an hour. By that point, I was literally down one knee in some of the worst pain I’ve ever experience in my entire life. I promptly shoved 400 mg of Advil down my throat and hopped into the shower to try to take my mind off of it. Sure as shit, 15 minutes later the pain subsided, and I went to bed.

Moral of the story: Ear aches fucking suck, and I wouldn’t wish them on my worst enemy. If this is happening to you, take ibuprofen. It works. I’m also aware that this story probably makes me sound like a giant pussy.