Wow. Just wow. Not many words can describe how relieved I am that Chris Koooooooooonitz buried a shitty one-timer into the back of the net last night behind Craig Anderson in double OT. I’ll probably be able to watch this replay when I’m an old, miserable asshole, and it will still bring a smile to my face while I eat hard candy for breakfast.

Also, the sound of that god damn goal horn blaring for 30 seconds straight will never get old. This only really happens after a huge goal is scored to end the game, but it’s one of the more unique aspects in sports. This gave me a flashback of the Bonino OT-winner that eliminated the Caps last year. Goosebump city.

If I can be serious a second, though, I’m not lying when I say I was close to having multiples panic attacks last night in overtime. I literally thought I was going to die each and every time Erik Karlsson lugged the puck all the way into the offensive zone. The guy played nearly half of an 85-minute game last night (39:33 TOI), and he didn’t look tired for a single second. Guys were literally running into nets and shit in OT, and Karlsson was striding around like a stallion on skates. Just a total mind-boggling performance by 65 in white, which included assists on both of Ottawa’s goals. There’s no argument that this guy isn’t the best defenseman in the league right now (even if I hate his stupid goatee and long hair).

I also have to dish out some credit to the Senators as whole here. Before the series began, I didn’t even think this would take the Pens more than five games to wrap things up. And man, did these guys make me look like a giant asshole blogger for undermining them. Say what you want about Guy Boucher’s boring defensive trap system. It’s probably a terrific cure for insomnia, and it’s probably bad at getting new people interested in hockey. But it works. And it was only one goal away from getting his team to the Stanley Cup Final. Also, gotta give Craig Anderson a TON of credit. Without him bouncing back the way he did after getting torched on his birthday for four goals in Game 5, the Senators wouldn’t have even made it seven games. If it wasn’t for JG Pageau screening him on Kunitz’s one-time, we’d probably still be watching these two teams duke it out in OT.

So enough of me sucking the Sens’ dicks. How bout those Pittsburgh Penguins? In an era where it’s seemingly impossible to win back-to-back Stanley Cups, the boys in black and gold have a really, really good shot of repeating. And if they actually do it, it would be the first time any team has since the 97-98 Detroit Red Wings. It also happens to be the second time in less than a decade that the Penguins have made it to the Final in back-to-back years. Pretty awesome time to be a Pens fan, indeed. I’m assuming this is sort of what it feels like to be a Patriots fan because the haters are out in full force. It was only a decade ago that people were building us up into winners when Sid made his way in the league. Now, they all wanna tear us down and see Sid get bashed in the head more. Sad. But I’ll gladly take this side over being a jealous little bitch like Brandon Dubinsky any day of the week.

This guy’s a GRADE A LOSER. If anyone on the Penguins ever did such a thing, he’d be vaporized by Mike Sullivan immediately.

I’ll have a lot more to say in the coming days about Pens-Preds so I’ll just leave it here for now. Let’s all soak this one in and let our buttholes continue to unclench in the meantime.